I want readers to know my perspective before reading this blog. I hate the “everyone gets a medal” culture and the idea that people should be praised for doing the bare minimum. I love how the culture in sports holds people accountable and rewards those who do the extra and go above and beyond.
I write this blog as someone who has spent her life in sports culture and has an internal critic who expects more from EVERYTHING. I also hate “self-help” and when people speak as if they have it all figured out because they do not.
With that said, I am currently working on this in my own life and thought you might be too. I am not a psychologist or expert and certainly do not have it all figured out. This is simply my perspective at this point.
As athletes and coaches, it is easy to fixate on what can be better. I need to get out of bed five minutes earlier, I need to go to bed thirty minutes earlier, I need to eat a clean breakfast and not a bagel with cream cheese, I need to add hours of mobility to my training, I need to run more, I need to get my blog posts to Jen earlier (thanks for putting up with me, Jen), I should have corrected the athlete in this way....it goes on and on.
This “critic,” as Caeleb Dressel refers to it, is part of what makes us great. We must be critical of what we do. That is how we get better and gain an advantage over our competitors. But the critic without praise and appreciation is exhausting.
When I notice the critic monopolizing my thoughts, I step back, identify something I did well (no matter how small), and appreciate something about the moment. For example (this happened this morning):
Critic: You got out of bed late. You need to get up ten minutes earlier. You expect discipline from your athletes; demand it from yourself.
Something I did well: I got out of bed at 5 a.m. I am not a morning person, so this is decent. I was not as early as I would like for my first obligation of the day, but I was on time.
Appreciation: I got out of bed late because my usually not-so-cuddly dog was snuggled up next to me. Our pets are only with us for a short part of our lives and I want to love my dog as much as I can for as long as I have him. One day, I will be thankful I spent those extra ten minutes with him. I am thankful for and appreciate the love of this dog.
The critic treats us like robots or algorithms, constantly pushing for perfection. Noticing something we did well allows us to see our improvement, and appreciation makes us human again.
I realize this is not new or profound (as very few things are), but I have been working on this process, and it seems to help me live in the moment and be more relaxed.
Coach Sydney brings more than 20 years of swimming experience to Team MPI as both a swimmer and coach. As a swimmer, she was a Colorado State Champion, State Record Holder, and All-American. She moved on to compete for the University of North Texas, an NCAA Division I team, qualifying for National Invite and Conference USA Championships. As a coach, Sydney has coaching experience at the NCAA Division I level with UNT and is now the Head Coach for the Colorado Torpedoes in Manitou Springs, CO.
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